Art of conscious self-development

Personal development • Self-Coaching

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Happiness in 12 days

Happiness in 12 days

One of the most important things that I’ve learned in my life was that being happy is a skill. You can learn how to feel happy by changing your mindset or developing some habits. Everyone can be truly happy if they spend some time and focus their attention on this subject.

I have written a lot of articles about being happy. So now I decided to choose 12 of them, which I think are the most important. I’ve put them together in one place. This way you won’t skip a single one and you’ll know how to read them in a proper order. Reading one article a day for 12 days you teach you how to enjoy life! : ) (note: some of these articles are not translated yet)  

Days 1-3: Get to know your mind

Stage one of becoming a truly happy man is realizing some minds’ mechanisms. You need to know how does your mind work and how does it filter reality, creating a certain model of reality in your head. 

Activity of mind filters – there are many kinds of filters such as senses, opinions, habits and beliefs about the world. Each of them shapes your world and the way you perceive reality. Through the filters we create our map of reality which determines the way we live. 

Responsibility – something that many people lack. By blaming others and entire world, we deprive ourselves of control and possibility of changing our lives. You need to take control of your life so you can decide what depends on you. You are the only one who creates your reality and happiness.  

No legs, no hands, no worries – Nick Vujicic is the perfect and very inspiring example. Despite the fact that he was born with no legs and hands, he has found the way to overcome many obstacles in his life. He has started to think that his disability is a gift and it depends on his mind whether he wants to feel disabled or not. 

Days 4-6: Get rid of negative emotions

Stage two is about getting rid of negative emotions and beliefs about your life. The most important thing in creating happy life is to stop being unhappy.  

How to deal with the past – you need to ask yourself “Is there any good side of that painful or negative experience?”, “What have I learned from it?”, “Was that experience really unpleasant?”. You have to keep your distance from the past events and think of them as the experiences in order to get rid of negative emotions.  

Is that thought consistent with the truth? – I want you to look at “The Work” method by Byron Katie. It will help you to get rid of bad thoughts and negative feelings. A thought is the source of pain only if you believe so. Stories that you create in your mind have nothing to do with reality. “The Work” method is about answering four questions:
– Is that thought consistent with the reality?
– Are you absolutely sure that certain thought is consistent with the reality?
– How do you feel when you are thinking that thought?
– Who would you be without that thought?
Next thing is to reverse thought and think about three authentic argumentations for which that new thought is real. 

The cult of materialism – Do you become attached to material things? It is very important for you to realize that every material thing you have is not a part of you but just something useful. Material things don’t shape who you are. 

Days 7-9: Practise your muscle of happiness

Stage three contains specific skills which are useful in learning how to feel happiness and joy. Develop positive habits and enjoy your life! 

An everyday gratitude list – Learn how to appreciate the life you already have. Be thankful for everything that makes you happy even if certain things can be less meaningful, make a daily list of such things. Day by day you will notice that your list gets longer and longer. You should honestly be grateful and you need to consider every thing in your mind. Then say ‘thank you’ in your mind. Be able to be thankful also for negative things that have happened to you and to learn from them. Make such list every morning and evening. 

Make today a wonderful day – There are a few things that can make your day special. You can excersise, turn your favourite music on, go outside, appreciate things you have or do something completely different, out of scheme. Remember that it’s all about the present moment so live it as best as you can. 

Be here and now – the idea of state of up-time is to stay focus on that moment so you can be aware of it. It allows you to sharpen your senses. Time is an illusion created by human mind. The past is behind you. 

Days 10-12: Find your mission

The final stage is about discovering your passion and finding out what is the most important for you in life. 

Discover your top life values – the first step to make your dreams come true. Every decision you make is determined by your hierarchy of values. You also ought to realize which values you are guided by. You will be happy when your goals, decisions and actions will be coherent with your highest values.  

How can you find your passion in life? – If you haven’t already found your passion you shouldn’t give up and never stop looking. Read magazines, book, blogs, watch movies and keep studying different things. You should ask questions because they stimulate your brain to find answers. All the time try completely different things like hobbies, jobs, music. Keep dwelling on a subject that you are interested in. It will be the best investment in your life.  

Route to goal – More often the path you follow to make your dreams come true is more important than the outcome itself. You shouldn’t depend your happiness on achieving your goals. It’s important for you to ask yourself if you are happy in that accurate moment of your life. Enjoy the road!  

Read one article a day and immediately enter it into practice. Watch how does this acquired knowledge work in practice and make changes consciously. Working actively on your luck you’ll see how quickly you learn to enjoy life. I wish you a lot of happiness, smiles and joy! : )  

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